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I'm worried about repeating my previous post-secondary social experience.

A photo of napinhei napinhei
I don’t really know how to describe myself...

I’m not a party person, but I’m also not a total hermit. I got partying out of my system in high school and have had no interest in it since. I’ve done one year at Mohawk College, and one semester at Sheridan College. Both times, I had no interest in going to parties.

When I was at Sheridan, I lived on res. I had no interest in going out and getting off my face drunk. I couldn’t even stand having people running around at 11pm or later knocking on doors when I had class early the next day. Res life did not suit me and I do not plan on doing it again.

Don’t get me wrong, I met a lot of people and made some really good friends. Still, the people that I found – again, this is just what I personally found - were always one of the two extremes. The partiers that I met were hardcore, going all night long. The more mellow people, let me just say, were not my type. They were, for lack of a better description, socially awkward Anime kids. I’m not a jerk; there isn’t anything wrong with that and I don’t mean to stereotype them, but I'm being utterly serious. If they are happy being that way, so be it, but that isn’t me. So I felt really out of place with basically all the people I met.

I’m the type of person that likes to hang out during the day, then go home and keep to myself most evenings. Then when I’ve got the time, I don’t mind going with a small group of friends for a casual night out to a small pub for some drinks, a basket of wings, and a few good laughs.

I’m only 20 years old. Are there not others my age who are like that at post-secondary institutions? I don’t want to party, but I don’t want to be a loner. Will my upcoming university experience be the same as what I’ve experienced thus far? Particularly based on my university choices?

For background information, my program/university choices are in my signature and yes, they are in order of preference if that helps.
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2 replies
A photo of ktel ktel
Your problem was probably living in res. I spent a summer living with a bunch of res kids in Germany (they were Canadian kids) and all they did was drink their face off every night. Not my scene. I like drinking and partying once every couple of weeks, not every night. I've been able to find friends in many places, at school, through sports, and a lot of them share my view. A lot of them are also a bit older, which probably helps.
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A photo of Kirenne Kirenne
I am totally like that.

I've never had a partying phase though, and probably never will. I have zero interest in drinking.

Oh, and I'm 20 too. I have my boyfriend, but other than him I don't have many close friends. It's sad to admit, but I guess my first year residence experience kind of cut me off from socializing in a way. I didn't get along with two of them, and the other one was my friend from high school. I didn't end up becoming very close with any of them. It didn't help that I was in a townhouse rather than on a floor. I didn't see very many people and as a result didn't meet very many people. Obviously I met some people in class, but I was pretty shy in my first year, and I was content hanging out with my high school friend rather than branching out. In second year my high school friend and I fought and drifted, and while I still talk to her, I don't think we could ever be close. By the time I realized I didn`t really have anyone, people had already formed their social circles.

So yeah, try to meet people first year, trust me there will be plenty of others in the same boat. :)
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