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Review needed for letter of intent (Architecture program)

A photo of slrichard2 slrichard2
Hey Everyone,

First of all I'd like to put it out there that I am unsure if this is the proper thread to post this topic in seeing as though Architecture doesn't fit the "Math, Engineering & Computer Science" bit.

I am applying to Dalhousie's undergraduate Architecture program (Bachelor of Environmental Design Studies), a program that requires 2 years of undergraduate studies. I'll be finishing my Bachelor of Arts at Mount Allison this May, so the two years prerequisite isn't my worry. I've never written a letter of intent before so I'm asking you for your feedback, it would be greatly appreciated!

P.S - This isn't necessarily my final draft.

"To Whom It May Concern:

My name is Skylar _______, of Point Du Chene, New Brunswick, ______ years old, and amongst other things I am fourth year student at Mount Allison University. These past four-and-then-some years of my life at Mt.A have been preoccupied with the study of philosophy – my major and, thankfully, one of the acquired passions of my early life. Attending one of the top undergraduate schools in Canada, while enrolled in a department with a graduating class of only six students, I have acquired, I believe, exceptional writing skills and an appropriate confidence to present my views on the abstract concepts as found in philosophy proper. I truly believe I have gained and taken advantage of everything my department has had to offer me since the declaration of my major, an opportunity that I believe has transformed into the greatest aspect of my work ethic. Although I have embraced my time at Mount Allison University with great awareness my time has nonetheless paid off, as I will be graduating this coming May.

A great passion of mine has been art; and more specifically, architecture. I have been lucky enough to travel to some of architecture’s most vibrant areas of the world, areas that have greatly inspired my imagination. These experiences, I believe, translate into my passion for philosophy and my excessive desire to study architecture at Dalhousie University. My true area of interest in philosophy has been the philosophy of biology – an area that deals with the study of adaptive methods as found in the study of evolution. More specifically, something that has truly taken my interest is the role of the environment on a species and how that species adapts or evolves due to its environmental pressures. Consequently, as my love for architecture has grown over the years, I am passionate to explore the relationship between architecture and the people who experience it, and how the individual’s behavior might be influenced by the structures that surround him or her. This is a relationship that I believe is essential to the growth in human creativity, an aspect of human behavior that I believe helps shape the individual and the individual’s environment. This is the foundation from which my love for architecture has started to build from.

Having grown up in an art-oriented family, alongside a history of working with a talented and unique contractor for the latter half of my life, I believe I posses, alongside the academic requisites and a deep fascination for architecture, what it takes to embrace and excel in the B.E.D.S program at Dalhousie University. This is an opportunity that has been at the forefront of my mind and I am excited to get the chance to move on to study a discipline that I hope to be my future profession.

Thank you and I hope to see you in September,
Skylar ______."

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